Why I Hate Malls…

I have a love/hate relationship with malls. When I go to the mall, I’m on a mission: I like to know exactly what I’m looking for so I spend the least amount of time in the mall as possible. I do this because nothing bores me more than the hustle and bustle of a busy shopping center. The other day I was on a mission but could not find what I was searching for. I spent hours looking but to no avail, so I decided to check one last store. As the escalator slowly carried me to my destination my hopes were dashed as the top floor came into view but not my object of desire. By this time I was too tired to go on. I was so discouraged and exhausted I wanted to collapse right there; but as I turned around in disappointment, my heart was lifted. In front of me was the most amazing bed I had ever seen! Right there at the top of the escalator! I didn’t care that everyone was watching; I didn’t care that it was probably not allowed; I didn’t care about my dignity. All I could think about was how great it would be to catch...

I Would Rather Die

Public speaking is the most widespread phobia, even topping the fear of death! This often makes my dad say, “People would rather die than give a speech!” I am one of those people. My whole life I have been afraid of public speaking! However, in September of 2003 God made it clear that He wanted me to be a preacher. “What! But God, you know how I feel about that…” But it was no use, I knew what God wanted me to do, and I couldn’t run from it. I tried though! I thought of every other option: I looked at different schools, I made lists of my abilities/talents/interests, I sought advice from everyone I knew, but it didn’t change the fact that God wanted me to preach.

The book of Jonah is one of my favorite books in the Old Testament, because Jonah was just like me! God told him to preach, and Jonah had a major problem with it. God told him to go to Nineveh, and Jonah decided to get in a boat and head the complete opposite direction. I can’t blame him! The people of Nineveh were famous for their brutality: They...

A Minivan, a Spider, and a Brush with Death

It started out as a peaceful summer drive in my minivan. Yes, I owned a minivan, complete with the speakers and blue interior lights that I added to give it a more “me” feel. I was driving through a set of stoplights when I caught something out of the corner of my eye descending from the roof onto my right shoulder. Now you must understand, there is one thing in life I am deathly afraid of. I’d say I’m afraid of failure, pain, rejection, and all the normal stuff, but nothing competes with my fear of spiders. They stand in a league of their own, challenging my very manhood and taunting me from their evil webs. Of course, I don’t like to let people know this, so I try to cover it up. After all, the spiders we have in Cochrane can’t even hurt you! But even if they could, that’s not why I’m afraid of them. There is some sort of deep-rooted animosity we have for one another that has lain beneath the surface since birth. But on this day, it burst forth in all its passionate glory: “THERE IS A SPIDER ON MY...

Barbed Wire and Ripped Pants

I used to like Capture the Flag. I was once under the impression that it was a safe and fulfilling way of releasing the aggressiveness built into every man. I don’t believe that now!

Several years ago I attended a youth retreat where we decided to kick off the first night with a game of Capture the Flag. Excitement spread throughout the group as we waited for dark. We gathered in the main lodge for “debriefing” and our youth leader explained the rules to us, but I was so excited I couldn’t listen. I missed the last and most important piece of advice he gave. “And don’t get too close to the boundaries,” he said, “because there is a barbed wire fence on one side that may be hard to see in the dark. Have fun everyone!” I jumped up and raced outside. The whistle blew and I immediately ran to the far side of the field where the tree cover was. It was completely dark now and I knew I would stand a better chance of not being seen if I stuck to the edge. However, the other team had predicted my clever plan and had...

Space Mountain

On a family trip to Disney World, my Dad decided it was time for his oldest son (I was four-years-old) to experience Space Mountain. Right away there were obvious obstacles—my height, the large crowds, and Mom. “We” decided to wait out the large crowds, encourage Mom to do some shopping (so she might remain ignorant of our adventure), and, well, we’d worry about my height when we got there.

As we approached the entrance, it became obvious I was too short, but Dad had a plan. He propped his hat on top of my head, instructed me on how to walk straight (and on the tips of my toes), and put on his most intimidating scowl. The poor, terrified teenager at the entrance had no time to question my height as my Dad growled, “He’s tall enough,” and dragged me through the line to begin our wait.

As we waited, my father slowly started to remember how long it had been since he had ridden this roller coaster. As we inched through the line, doubt began to creep into his head. “Mike, it’s ok, it’s not really as scary as...

Stone Face

I can’t play real golf, but I’m pretty good at the kid’s version. I remember a mini golf course I went to with my family while on vacation. It was amazing! There were castles, pirate ships, and windmills. It was like walking into a fantasy world!

By the time we got to the last hole, it was dark outside. The final hole consisted of a long stretch of turf leading up to a giant statue that looked like it came from a temple deep in the Amazon. It was a huge stone head, and the goal was to shoot your ball straight down the turf into a small hole at the base.

My entire family tried but each of them missed and lost their ball to the gutter. Then, it was my turn. Knowing that you usually got a prize if you made the final shot, I looked around to see if anyone could see me, then picked up my ball and ran down the turf. I reached across the gutter and dropped my ball in the hole. Nothing happened. Maybe I just have to tell them on the way out and collect my prize? But how do I prove it?

Disappointed, I turned...

Distractions

I have two problems. The first is this: I am self-conscious and don’t like to look stupid. That does not work out too well with my second problem: I tend to make a fool of myself regularly…

I was excited as we drove to the video rental store. My brother Dan and I were going to chill out together and play video games, watch movies and eat junk food all night! Of course, as the eldest, this was the opportune moment to show my sibling just how cool his older brother was! We cruised up to the movie store, driving too fast with the tunes blaring and our shades on (even though it was nighttime). We strutted our way through the doors of Movie Gallery, taking our time and soaking up the envious gazes as we made our selections and proceeded to the front counter. There was a teenage girl working the counter. I flashed my most dazzling smile, and she blushed in response. As we exited the building, I caught something out of my peripheral vision. Could it be? I thought, Yes it could! There was a pretty girl waving to me...

Drawing Water

A couple of years ago I traveled to Qatar, a small nation on the Arabian Peninsula, with my father. As we entered the gated community where we were to stay, a security officer quickly approached us. Oh, no, I thought, we just arrived and already we’re in trouble! However, the man was grinning broadly as he leaned into the driver’s side window. “Welcome my friends!” He looked to the back seat where I sat. “You must be Mike!” That depends, I thought, is he in trouble? But then he leaned in through the window to shake my hand! He warmly welcomed us, and the week we stayed there was one of the most pleasant times I’ve had! James (not his real name) greeted us every morning and every night, always smiling. The man’s joy was contagious.

That week was a flurry of activity as I met fascinating people, led Bible studies, ate brains (stupid dare…), and even got to drive a quad through sand dunes in the desert. Just before we left, James dropped in to say good-bye. That’s when I learned his story…

James was...

This Had Better Be Strong Velcro!

I am a daredevil. I mean, I’m no Evel Knievel, but I love roller coasters, snowboarding and I’ve eaten some adventurous foods (what can I say? My sister likes to cook…). When the opportunity presented itself to bungee jump, something inside me was stirred…

In May, 2007, I traveled to Athens, Greece, with a group of college students to volunteer for two weeks at a refugee center. While most of our time was spent meeting and helping wonderful people at the center, we did take a couple days to experience the sites of Greece. We rented a bus, hooked up with a local missionary friend, and took a mini road trip to see ancient Corinth. About two hours from our destination we made a rest stop at the famous Corinthian Canal. Although the canal itself is impressive, what first caught my eye was a small building to the side with a sign that read “Bungee Jumping”. Before I could stop myself, I said three words that still haunt me to this day, “I’d do it.” However, as I got off the bus walked across the bridge I began...