Josiah Road

AB…D? Please Don’t Fire Me

posted by Daniel Blackaby 6Feb

When you’re like me, lazy and terminally useless, there are few things in life as humbling as filling out a job application:

Name: Daniel R. Blackaby

Previous Work Experience: Every journey starts with a first small step…

Talents/abilities: N/A

Understanding that most businesses were now using my applications as scrap paper and coasters, I almost fainted when I received a call from Eleanor, owner of the local video store, informing me I started on Monday!

I was determined to prove that, though her only choices were hiring me or remaining short-staffed, I’d be a valuable employee. Monday morning I arrived forty-five minutes early…on the dot, looking sharp.

When Eleanor peeled up in her rusty pickup truck, I gave a slight bow, “Greetings my lady.”

She snarled, “You’re in customer parking, move.” In that precise moment I understood I wasn’t exactly going to be working side-by-side with Mother Theresa. In her deep, scratchy voice she barked out my orders for the day. The Open sign was lit, customers poured in, and with her eyes peering through me, I shot into action.

It started great! The customers adored me! I did an extra thorough job cleaning shelves, and demonstrated complete mastery over the till. I was charming, funny, and devoured any task put in front of me. Eleanor must have been pleased!

However, the tide turned with one simple demand, “Dan, return these videos now.” I glanced in horror towards the counter to see a mammoth stack of returns. People have set up base camps under smaller things than this!

I gulped, I knew my moment had arrived; it was now-or-never-time to prove myself to Eleanor. Today boys would become men. This was my Apollo Creed match; this was my David and Goliath tale. Like Edison and his light bulb before me, the next few moments would define me.

As I started separating the pile, I sensed Eleanor hovering behind me, taking in my every action. This is not to say I have some uncanny sixth sense, but rather that I could smell the conflicting smells of Zesty Doritos and carrots on her breath as her face rested inches from mine.

Organizing them alphabetically to increase efficiency, I quickly had a discouraging realization, I couldn’t remember the alphabet. The first video was “King Arthur,” “Now K comes after…um…W?…no…before S!… arg…sigh…abcdefghij…K! Yay! One down…fifty-three to go.” This became my routine for each movie.

I had organized four more videos when I felt a strong hand grasp my shoulder, “Please–for the love of Tom Cruise, stop singing that song!” I spent the rest of my shift re-washing clean windows. Scratch that one down as a failure.

Christians can suffer from the same downfall. We seek to please God or peers with actions or head knowledge, but the basic foundation of our faith is ignored or forgotten. If we are merely participating in Christian activity and memorizing Scripture, we are no different than the Pharisees. Our relationship with Jesus is the cornerstone and foundation of our faith; if we neglect it, all else inevitably tumbles down.

For am I now seeking the favour of men, or of God, Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10