Josiah Road

I Don’t Feel So Good…

posted by Daniel Blackaby 25Jul

As most guys do, I continually seek to maintain a fairly high score on the macho-o-meter (although the fact that I’m only five foot six and embarrassingly scrawny doesn’t help matters). I like to give off the impression that I’m a pretty strong guy who’s got things together. However, these masculine ideals were tossed out the window last week when I caught a virus and completely self-destructed.

My family just moved into a transitional apartment in anticipation for our move to South Carolina at month’s end. I was excited! Living in such close quarters would be a great way of family bonding! I envisioned card games filled with laughter and movie nights with popcorn! However, I thought the rapture had come the way people started leaving! Mom – Saskatoon to visit sister, Dad – Alaska for work, Sister – off to summer youth camp, girlfriend – Vancouver to find apartment. Guess it’s just me and my dog, Chevy, bacheloring it up this week! However, this dream bubble popped as well when I was informed the apartment didn’t allow pets; he’d be staying at a dog-sitter.

Doing what any self-respecting man would do in a situation like that, I purchased six boxes of Kraft Dinner and set up camp in front of my Xbox. Things might not be too bad after all!

Then it hit me. It started as a mere irritation in my throat. Never filled with even slight ambitions for med-school, I couldn’t distinguish Tylenol from pop-rocks. So I decided to just ‘tough it out.’

It got worse. I devolved a fever so high I could’ve invited over some friends and roasted marshmallows over it. My throat had swelled out like a toad, leaving me unable to shallow or eat (which stinks when you’re use to eating every twelve minutes). The second night I woke multiple times to throw-up. Having not eaten for two days, it was so dry and violent that blood vessels in my face exploded and my eyes swelled to golf balls. Lying in bed, in too much pain to even roll over, I began to cry. I felt so alone and desperate.

However, God is good and sent me a much needed angel on the third day (one who also goes under the title of ‘my girlfriend’). Along with her came medication, chicken noodle soup, and rides to and from doctor’s appointments. I still feel pretty lousy, but it’s comforting to know that there’s somewhere here who will take care of me.

Have you ever found yourself in that place, desperate or alone? Several times throughout my Christian journey there’ve been moments when I was spiritually sick, and I felt completely helpless, like no one understood or cared.

I encourage you not to struggle through those trying times alone. It’s not weak to let God carry you through those rough moments. In fact, it’s probably one of the best places you could ever be. The Bible says, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and loaded down with burdens, and I will give you rest” (Matt. 11:28). Having taken God up on the offer many times myself, I can promise you, He won’t let you down!